So You Can’t Write a Sex Scene

So you can’t write a sex scene

By Janet Post

My writing partner for erotica, believe it or not, is my daughter, Mel. She’s a bartender/restaurant manager with three kids and she knows stuff, for example, stuff about looners (people who include balloons in their sexual activity . . .  I know) and plushies (stuffed animal/costume freaks). You really have to have some kind of experiences of your own to draw from if you want to write real sex scenes that touch the readers. And there are a couple of rules we came up with.

First–do your research. We write m/m, paranormal, kinky romance. I know–pretty out there. But we do our research. I watched a lot of gay porn, read guy on guy erotica and Mel has a lot of gay friends. They have no problem telling her the most intimate things in graphic detail. Thank god.

Second–sex scenes are scenes in your story and as such must have a purpose. They have to move the story line along in some way. This is how it works, your couple gets together and one whispers a secret to the other one. A sex scene may be the critical moment in the relationship, either a commitment moment or a breakup moment. It can be an important milestone in your character’s personal growth. But whatever it is, it has to have a purpose.

Third–euphemisms have been terribly maligned. I’m here to tell you they are a must. And you need to choose them carefully. If the moment is tender, use softer euphemisms. If it’s rough, guy-on-guy sex between two paranormal characters use rougher euphemisms. If you have two guys making love and you’re in the macho guy’s head use different euphemisms than  if you were in the softer guy’s head. Make what they call their parts part of their character.

Fourth and most important–sex scenes are action scenes. Be careful with the length of your sentences. Keep the verbs hot and energetic. Always try to stay out of passive voice. Don’t put too much introspection into the sex scene itself, leave it for the afterglow. Watch the redundancies, especially with proper names and pronouns, think about each word you put into a sentence. Moment in time and location can add a lot to your sex scenes. Is this the critical sex scene that seals the commitment or just a one-night stand?

And there you have it; four steps to writing a great sex scene. Don’t forget they are always emotional in some way, passion is great but is one of them cheating, is there guilt, is there fear of loss? Now go for it.

 

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New cover! Flight of the Phoenix!

This is the amazing new cover for the last book in the series, Saga of the Steampunk Witches, Flight of the PhoenixFlight of the Pheonix sm cover

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Flight of the Crow Released!

Steampunk
I write Steampunk fiction. My newest is a trilogy, a three-part series called The Saga of the Steampunk Witches. Steampunk covers a broad range of fun and inventive scenarios that can run from nineteenth century fiction, to dystopian fiction to modern fiction featuring alternative worlds in which steam-powered technology rules. When I write, I freely invent any kind of mechanical device I want or need and make it steam powered.
Steampunk offers a fantastic arena to invent fun worlds, great characters and fanciful plots. My heroines, yes there are two, are witches living in a steampunk world. When they flee the bad guy, they use air ships powered by steam, undersea vessels, aircraft, motorcycles and cars. All of these vehicles are steam-powered. You can literally take any piece of equipment or machinery and make it steam powered. It’s your world. You get to do what you want.
My characters travel all over the globe. They are free to do this because in their steampunk world, there are so many travel options.
Clothing in the nineteenth century steampunk world is also fun and can be as crazy as you want. The fashions of the day prevail; bustles, frills, corsets for the women. Men wear herringbone or plaid suits with huge watches and bowler hats. You have to have scientists and inventors. They can be men or women, clothe themselves in leather aprons, massive goggles and gauntlets filled with all kinds of fantastic tools and devices.
The precursors of modern Steampunk are Jules Verne, Mary Shelley and H.G. Wells. Verne went undersea and into space, Shelley had Frankenstein and crazy machinery designed to reanimate the dead. Wells invented a time machine. All fun and all crazy steampunk.
Check out my newest release, Flight of the Crow from Torrid Books.
Flight of the Crow COVER

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More On-Line Dating for the Elderly

I’ve been trying to understand the dating scene for the over sixty crowd. I’ve blogged a little about it and since have had several more dates. One thing I’ve discovered. Certain sites draw certain types. Beware of free sites. Most of the offerings found there are poor…

Trendy sites draw an eclectic mix. One trendy site I won’t name provided me with two of my most recent adventures. Date one was a “biker.” I discovered why his email address is philthyphil. He smelled really bad. I’m not talking a little BO. I’m talking goat pee crossed with slept-drunk-in-my-clothes-for-a-week crossed with ass. He rode his bike up to see me without a sissy bar. Translated that meant no backrest for his rider so I had to actually touch him. Then, yes there’s more, I discovered aside from being rude to waiters and disrespectful of me, he also managed a strip joint for a living. What a prize!

Moving on. My next date off this site was truly a sad person. He turned out to be a life-long junky disguised as a vet. He lived with his mom, could barely see and had numerous health issues too terrible to discuss in this blog.

The truly bizarre detail I discovered from these two was they were both looking for a much younger woman, preferably a blond. Dream on boys, dream on.

I’m thinking about taking my dad’s advice and learning ballroom dancing, or maybe karate. Who knows. Apparently only the crazed and needy troll the dating sites. I’m not there yet.

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Dating after fifty…new rules

I’m no longer young and recently divorced so I decided to try out internet dating for the old. I’ve discovered several things. The questionnaire needs several more categories. They do ask what body type you are. However, they do not provide enough categories. They ask hair color, eyes, height and body type. They completely ignore important categories for the old such as mobility, illnesses, medicines. And trust me, they will come up.

For Mobility they need: A. Walker, B. Cane, C. Wheelchair, D. Hip or Knee Replacement, E. Walks Unassisted, F. Can Run.

For Illnesses: A. Cancer, B. Dementia, C. Heart Disease, D. High Blood Pressure, E. Incontinence, (and for dating sites the most important of all) F. Impotence.

The should require each elderly dating candidate to list all medicines being taken.

Okay, you’re laughing but I assure you it’s not funny. I’m moderately active, can run, take no medicine and have no illnesses. You can’t imagine how alone I am in the over-fifty crowd. It’s so depressing. Especially when someone who lists themselves as needing to lose a few pounds turns out to be grossly obese. They are great on the phone and then you find out they smell funny. Another category! What kind of cologne do you wear? If it’s Stetson or Old Spice go away.

All you young folks out there pushing us elderly to get into the internet dating scene understand this; it’s a lot different when you get old. The bar scene is looking better and better or maybe I should take up ballroom dancing. At least you can see who you’re talking to and they can’t hide behind a picture taken in 1990.

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Andre Norton was the Queen of SciFi

The first Andre Norton book I read was Cat’s Eye. I read it when I was 16. Since, I have devoured anything she’s written. Although gone now, she left a legacy of SciFi novels that no writer can hope to best. 

Many of her works are being reissued in volumes with more than one story. I just finished The Game of Stars and Comets. Inside the covers were four crazy and different novels that held my interest for several days. Norton’s technology is surely outdated, but easily overlooked because of the masterful way she created different worlds, alien cultures and societies. Her vision of the universe was filled with amazing animals, bizarre vegetation and believable aliens with wonderful talents and fantastic physical bodies. No other SciFi author can claim as many different worlds. Her imagination was beyond compare.

The first offering in The Game of Stars and Comets is The Sioux Spaceman where an American Indian is sent to a primitive world under control of a heartless reptilian race called the Styor. He helps the enslaved aliens free themselves by importing Terran horses and teaching them their value. It’s an uplifting story taking place out there in space on an alien planet.

The second story is Eye of the Monster where a young man dreaming of a career in Survey but stuck on a planet with his pacifistic uncle, rescues two children from the native race when it revolts and attacks the settlers. Norton blends this Terran with a Salaricki female who is very catlike. Together they save the kids and form a strange bond. Very cool story.

The third story is The X Factor. A misfit human steals a tape and spaces for an unknown planet where he becomes the X Factor saving stranded archeologists trying to discover an ancient treasure from hijackers. The misfit finds himself among the brothers in fur. It’s a touching story about someone who finally realizes his full potential.

The last offering is Voorloper. On a far away planet, a young man has to overcome losing his father and discover why entire settlements are being wiped out.

The Game of Stars and Comets will give you hours of enjoyment as you jet to far away planets on Andre Norton’s imagination.

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White Fire, Fresh from Preston/Child Rocks

Douglas Preston/Lincoln Child are two of my favorite authors. In this newest offering, White Fire, the writing duo teams Special Agent Pendergast with his protégée, Corrie Swanson. Swanson wants to write her thesis about bones found in a Colorado ski resort supposedly gnawed on by a grizzly bear. Pendergast has to rescue her from the locals and together they solve an ancient mystery. The book’s about greed that stretches from the days when the resort town was a silver mining hub into modern times.

Preston and Child invented the coolest man on earth with Special Agent Pendergast. He’s always right, always cool and in White Fire, his deductions actually involve another cool detective, Sherlock Holmes.

Swanson is not my favorite character. She makes stupid mistakes and sometimes, she’s like the woman in the horror stories who just has to look into the cellar. Using that kind of trite device to move the action bothered me, but the setting and Pendergast made the book enjoyable anyway. Just Swanson, and I would have voted no.

If yu’re looking for a fun read, check out White Fire.

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Read Divergent, Read Insurgent Why Oh Why did I Read Allegiant????

I have to admit, I was warned. A very nice person who read my last Divergent post told me not to go there….but I did anyway. I always follow through. I always finish what I start. Couldn’t I have just this once backed away? To all you avid readers out there, I say “Don’t do it!”

Step away from Allegiant, far away. Put it down and run. Even if you bought it don’t read it. You’ll be so sorry. I mean really, are there any people out there that liked it? Did her editor even like it? The only reason this book is in print is because Katherine Tegan Books knew it would make money.

Veronica Roth should be punished for Allegiant. She’s writing in first person present tense and suddenly, in Allegiant, she adds another POV. I wondered why. When she switches heads, there is no difference in thought patterns or even thoughts. You have no idea whose head you’re in unless you read the chapter heading. She goes into Tobias’s head and you wonder . . . why?

Lead character Tris continues to whine and act pathetic. Gone for good is the heroic, brave Tris we loved in Divergent. And, at the risk of spoiling everything for all you poor sps planning to read it, I’m saying gone for good. And I think, aha! That’s why we added another POV. Yes! Roth kills off poor Tris and leaves Tobias (Four) all alone for Christina, who of all the characters in Divergent is about the only one left at the end of Allegiant. I guess Roth was proving how brave she is. She can kill off a beloved character (well maybe not so beloved by the end of book three). All I have to say is if you’re going to kill off the lead character, at least have a good reason. There was no reason to kill Tris. The plot wasn’t advanced, there was no greater good achieved. It was a stupid move. If Roth ever writes anything again, I will not read it. She has dropped to the level of George R.R. Martin, killing off characters for the sheer pleasure of murder.

So, and I reiterate, run, run fast and far. Do not read Allegiant!

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Christian Mingle Enables Predators to Target Older Women

Continue reading

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Divergent was good but Insurgent??? What the hell?

I finished Divergent by Veronica Roth in one day. It was a terrific read. I had trouble at first with the first person present tense thing, not my comfort zone at all, but the characters were captivating and the storyline unique. So . . . I bought Insurgent. What happened Veronica? The storyline is okay but the characters. Eeeuuuuwww! Tris turns into a weepy weakling. Where did the kick-butt sixteen-year old go? We’re left with a crybaby who can’t hold a gun. I swear she cries through the entire book. And she’s injured throughout and even though she’s in pain, gets tortured, runs, jumps, and fights. Only when it’s crucial to the storyline does she collapse in agony and, of course, start crying again.

Then there is Four who morphs into Tobias. Tobias is so weak in Insurgent he’s barely recognizable. To create conflict between Four and Tris, Roth makes up all these lame fights and trust issues. The two can’t even talk to each other without some made up quarrel intruding. And then there’s the sex, or should I say lack thereof. Tobias/Four must be made out of marble. When they’re together all they do is neck. The guy never even tries to get a little side, or cop a feel. They sleep in the same bed, he never touches her  . . . anywhere! I know sex is a hard thing to manage in YA. He’s eighteen and she’s sixteen so there’s the legality of it all along with the creep factor. But this is a made up world in the future with its own rules and laws. It’s hard to like a guy who is so weak when he’s supposed to be so strong. I loved four in Divergent, but he lost me in Insurgent.

So, the question is, should I read the last book? At the moment I’m waffling. I can’t recommend Insurgent, but if you’re into the story, go ahead and read it. Kind of like Game of Thrones, you like the world, but the author has lost her way.

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